there is a "friend" of mine that represents behaviors that just push my buttons. he can't accept someone boundaries, like most aries i met tbh but well, we were closer when younger but now i try to put limits.
back then i remember he always forced to see my belly until i accepted to be left alone but that's crazy if you think about it.
when adults now we would see and talk to each other really rarely, buy i would always send him a birthday msg on the 25th.
anytime i did he was like "oh thank you, your bday is the 1st of the month right?" so he KNOWS my birthday but never wished me, so what's the reason?
2 years ago i started mimicking people energy so i stopped wishing him a bday wvile he purposely ignore mine, it's not lile not knowing, and guess who came back to talk to me the very day after even tho he doesn't care about me the rest of the year? him.
he started by "oh haha how are you" and i replied like he would do "i'm good oh your bday was yesterday right?" playing dumb and nonchalant.
but he felt he lost his control on me/my attention on him kinda, because he started to ask questions about my life but in a "imma find a new way to get smth from you" way.
i told him i had been cyberharassed and due to that i am depressed, going out is complicated for me, so if i don't talk a lot either it's because i'm not in the best mood. i also randomly talked about my ipad and then he imposed, not proposed, we should see each other with my ipad outside like right now.
i felt taken in hostage, i explained i don't wanna be showing this expensive device outside and be possibly robbed and that as i told him i don't feel like going out nowadays, he didn't respect that, but even so it wasn't in a benevolent way yk.
but he insisted finding any way possible that kinda reminded me my cyberharasser tbh "i will wait for you at your work/i will be in front of your appartement" it wasn't to help just to win, he was forcing me despite my numerous NOS as before.
then he made me feel guilty for something that is not my problem "you know i didn't see a lot of people because of covid and you are leaving me alone" is pandemic my fault? you don't care about me the whole year suddenly you want to see me? i snapped back at him saying that. then he dipped. i felt good standing up for the first time.
nowadays after these few years he sent me a msg saying he wanted to meet for a roleplay campaign idea, i accepted but said that i don't know where to find the time to do all this, because you know there is a lot of preparation etc. i am working a lot, taking shifs of my colleagues randomly and he is unemployed so full time free, so technically you adapt in function of the one being busy because you have all the time.
i would say "the first week is complicated because we have a lot of work can you wait next week?" and he couldn't stop sending the whole week "when we could meet??", damn dude i didn't even say no just please wait and he can't and still try to impose HIS choice??? i even ended sick because of all the stress, it looked hard for him to wait more, as if his whims had more value than someone health.
finally we found a week end and i said i was free the afternoons. he started to complain "can we not the morning i have stuff to do the afternoon i'm busy" i explained that since i end my shift the day before at 22h, i had plans to of buying food etc, and it's complicated for me and my anxiety to be efficient the early morning after. he was forcing me to adapt my rythm to him again. wtf, i didn't even tell him to cancel his plans for me but i have to? he is the one that want to see me he should make the move correctly. crazy that this is the person running everywhere that have to adapt and not the one that can do his things any other day?? it's the audacity bothering me.
but at the end you know what bothers me too? that i can't even talk to it to other friends because they don't care if the topic doesn't revolve around them.
