It’s been better lately. Not happy, but also not pure misery as before. I can push through and do most things. I do it on autopilot: get up, go out with the dog, feed myself and the dog. Existence doesn’t feel so pointless anymore, since I managed to accomplish small daily routines.

I’m slowly preparing my resume to search for a part-time job. I still see no hopes for the future, given that I’m 48, have no career, and can barely cope with the minimum that most other people don’t even consider work. I don’t care about life enough to actually live. The very thought that I’ve wasted 7 years of my life on depression torments me like nothing else. And since November I’ve been having passive suicidal thoughts. I don’t actually plan to do anything about it, it just became another sick trait of mine. When I get out of bed and think of the few things I must do, like shopping or taking my laptop to repairs, the next thought that flashes through my mind is, “I don’t want to, I should just die”. But I make myself do it anyway. These thoughts demotivate me and make it even harder to complete my daily tasks, and if I don’t do at least 2-3 things I had in mind for the day, I feel completely useless, and it fuels that slimy tiny voice whispering that I shouldn’t be alive. I suspect it’s because I can’t seem to find the drive to live. I’m killing myself without actually doing it, and I don't know how much longer I’ll be able to go on like this. It’s an endless cycle, and the worst part is that these thoughts just got stuck in my head and won't go away.

Sorry for dumping this on you, kind strangers

In today's complex world, we often have to face a lot of different events and responsibilities that can stir up complicated feelings. Sometimes life becomes overwhelmingly stressful. I’m a practicing psychologist, and I want to share with you some strategies to cope with daily pressures that proved to be useful:

● Make space for self-care.

We all manage stress in different ways. Some self-care basics are getting enough sleep, prioritizing healthy food and getting exercise. Consider what specifically works for you - perhaps, it’s walking in a park on a sunny day, going to a cinema, dancing to your favorite music, meditating or having a warm bath. Make a list of all the activities that help you relax and recharge, and try to do at least one each day.

● Set boundaries.

It's important to recognize situations or people that trigger stress, so you can prepare for them or avoid them when needed. If some situations are hard to escape, set clear boundaries. For instance, at a family gathering, ask relatives not to bring up certain tense topics, or plan an exit strategy if conversations get a bad turn - excuse yourself politely and leave the room until it calms down. Another example: if a friend or a family member always calls you at night when you don’t want to talk, ask them to stop doing it or create a clear time limit on how long you can be on the call.

● Practice being present.

Being present in everyday life helps us enjoy the moment more, be aware of our thoughts and feelings without being caught up in them, and reduces stress and anxiety. Try being fully engaged in whatever you’re doing. The best way to do it is by using all of your 5 senses. Pay attention to the warmth of a hot drink, the aroma and taste of food, the texture of a blanket. Listen closely to your friends and family when you’re with them. As you walk outside, feel the wind or sun on your face and the ground under your feet. Focus on your surroundings, houses, trees and plants, and notice every sound: cars passing, people laughing, birds singing, songs from local cafes.

Focusing on these small details can help us instantly ground ourselves and feel more calm even amongst chaos. You can even create a “calm dawn kit” that will include objects to help you ground yourself at any time: for example, a squeeze ball, a scented cream or a candle, your favorite candies, a recording of nature sounds, a calming picture.

● Take a moment for gratitude.

Studies have shown that being grateful and thinking of positive things helps us cope with stress and improves emotional well-being. Here’s a simple practice that you can try:

- In the morning, after waking up, think of three things you are grateful for at this moment in your life. These can be simple but meaningful things. For example, the warmth and comfort of your home, the support of your loved ones, or the nice weather outside. Allow yourself to immerse in the state of gratitude and enjoy it.

- In the evening, before you go to bed, think about the past day. Remember three positive events that happened during the day - whether they were big events or small joys. For example, you had a great chat with a friend, tried a new dish in a cafe, watched a good movie, completed a task or just got through the day. Also allow yourself to feel gratitude for these moments.

For a better effect, write these things down as you think about them. It’s okay if you have a hard time feeling gratitude right away. Keep doing the practice on a regular basis and over time you may notice it feeling more natural.

● Reach out for support.

There’s something very healing in human connections and in knowing that we’re not alone in our struggles. Don't hesitate to reach out to close friends or family members you trust. Share your concerns and feelings with them. If there’s no one you can talk to, call a mental health helpline in your country. A person on the other line will listen empathetically and help you deal with these difficult emotions. It also can be helpful to search for local support groups where you can share your stories and talk about what’s bothering you in a safe environment. And if you feel like the stress is becoming too overwhelming, consider reaching out to a counselor or a therapist that will help you find the root of your problem and figure out ways to overcome it.

I hope these tips give you some ideas to make each day feel more manageable and less overwhelming. The key is to gently experiment with self-care strategies until you find what works for your needs. Feel free to share any other coping strategies that you find useful.

I’ve been in an abusive relationship during my teenage years, which I believe was the root of my panic disorder. It built gradually over the years, and at first I didn’t take it for what it was. I thought I was prone to fainting, and when my first serious panic attack hit me, I thought it was a heat stroke. Over time, I learnt to catch the early symptoms: the unexplainable bursts of terror in my stomach, the feeling of heat and intense sweating, parts of my body becoming numb. One day I had a wave of panic attacks so strong that I had to cancel all my plans and stay in bed all afternoon. It began to interfere with my work and my personal life. Every time I thought I’d be getting a tingling sensation in my hands, I’d become terrified that I was going to pass out. My husband who was watching me struggle with it all finally took me by the hand and escorted me to a psychiatrist.

I must say now that my first two attempts with medical professionals were a complete failure. The psychiatrist prescribed me a sedative and a selective serotonin inhibitor, to cope with my anxiety. It helped, so much so that I believed I was cured forever. How naive of me! I stopped taking the meds 1.5 months later, without consulting my doctor. Why take more pills, when I was absolutely fine, right? Well, never do that! Don’t be me. Any doctor will tell you that you must take your meds for at least 3 months, usually longer, for any long-term effect. So a month without my pills, and my panic returned in full force. I had an episode in the subway and crawled back home, completely defeated and without hope of being normal again.

My husband insisted that I see another doctor. My second one was more on the side of alternative medicine, and we practised meditation and breathing during the first couple of sessions. It kind of helped, but only when I was not alone. So after two weeks I decided against continuing the therapy sessions.

By that time, my attitude towards medical help was sceptical. I began my Internet search in the hope to find stories of other people coping with panic attacks. This brought me to CBT - cognitive behavioral therapy. It sounded effective, and I decided it could be my last chance. I spent weeks choosing the right therapist I’d be comfortable with. And my search was not in vain!

With my third therapist, we started by exploring what a panic attack actually is and what it does to my body. It really helped. With meditation I didn't quite know what I was doing. But understanding the fight-or-flight body response, the adrenaline rush, and how my fear of it only makes it worse – it all made sense. Then we started to learn the encouragement technique. Basically, the idea of CBT is to not battle a panic attack, but to let it happen and embrace it. So I was willingly controlling my thoughts. When my heart was beginning to race, my body temperature increasing, my task was not to fuss over it or try to stop it, but to lean into it. I had to tell my heart to race even faster. I had to imagine flames of fire dancing on my arms. I had to encourage my body to continue with its ridiculous panic in order to make my brain register that I was not afraid. There was nothing to be afraid of, and my body didn’t need to act as it did. Eventually, my goal was to anticipate my panic attacks with excitement. I know it sounds silly, but once you want to have a panic attack, you’ll never have one!

I haven’t had a single episode of panic in months now, and while I don’t consider myself cured, I’m confident I can handle it. All that matters is changing your reaction.

I hope it was helpful.

Where to start. Is it worth or not. But yes I'm suffering, suffering alot. I came long way but going back slowly and painfully. Actually, people around me doesn't understand. I'm married a year ago. It's gonna worse to handle by myself. Husband knew everything. He is consulting doctor. I'm on medication. Today doctor said you have to do something for yourself. Otherwise you will have take these for time. They are for support, not for cure. My husband said, Do whatever makes you happy. I felt tired after office so you should take care of yourself. I had to refreshed my mind.

Means, he has found his happiness by himself. He keeps using phone and laughing like an idiot. But I want him. I want him to laugh with me. He is not the reason of my anxiety. Is it too much I'm asking for?