my mom's behavior. I'm 18 and have been having severe panic attacks for the last year and a half. that's what my psychologist said. I don’t think so myself, because maybe it’s something else. The fact is that I have been living in this condition for a long time and my mother does not allow me treatment. the first year, when this effect had not yet taken hold and I went once to a psychologist with her cuz was underage. session hour. For the first 30 minutes she sat with me without allowing me to really say anything, then the doctor asked her to leave and she stood at the door as if she was eavesdropping...or was it just me? let's ignore this fact, I wasn't sure. After that, my mother said that the psychologist was useless and we would no longer attend therapy. that's it..what's next? Then there are a lot of reproaches and “pull yourself together, you can control this” “program yourself and everything will be fine” “just breathe deeply and everything will pass.” I lost my mind. These phrases began to cause aggression in me. I'll tell you honestly. When a person doesn’t understand your condition and says so, it infuriates me. Before all this, I was experiencing severe stress and wanted to kill myself, which my mother told the therapist about without my knowledge. She also says “look, this child has a disability, he is fighting for life, and you cut your wrists and want to kill yourself.”. (this especially irritates me) She also seems to be ashamed of me. Or she says that she’s tired of me and it’s all my fault, etc. Things got worse over time and I didn’t go into remission at all. and now I go to therapy once a week for panic attacks. And then, it was a necessary measure. By the way, now when I feel bad, my mother gets worried and has a hypertensive crisis, apparently due to stress, for which, of course, she blames me. It’s very difficult for me because I have no one else in my family, and even when I feel bad too and I’m in a panic, I help her, bring her water, etc. And when, during her hypertension, I sit down to check my pulse or blood pressure, I always hear “Everything is fine with you, stop measuring this crap, you’re stressing me out,” it’s all gotten to the point where I get very upset and blame myself for it. Also, many doctors said that I should visit a psychiatrist, but I live in a country where all this is recorded, and even one visit to a psychiatrist could end with me not going to university, not being able to work at a good job, being the scum of society and not I can drive a car..like this. I'm completely confused and don't understand what to do☹️ in a year I will have the opportunity to move in with a girl and leave her. and while I don’t have the opportunity to do this and I’m under the care of my mother, so to speak, then I would really like to get advice on how to learn to perceive it differently or how to ignore it..

I’ve been in an abusive relationship during my teenage years, which I believe was the root of my panic disorder. It built gradually over the years, and at first I didn’t take it for what it was. I thought I was prone to fainting, and when my first serious panic attack hit me, I thought it was a heat stroke. Over time, I learnt to catch the early symptoms: the unexplainable bursts of terror in my stomach, the feeling of heat and intense sweating, parts of my body becoming numb. One day I had a wave of panic attacks so strong that I had to cancel all my plans and stay in bed all afternoon. It began to interfere with my work and my personal life. Every time I thought I’d be getting a tingling sensation in my hands, I’d become terrified that I was going to pass out. My husband who was watching me struggle with it all finally took me by the hand and escorted me to a psychiatrist.

I must say now that my first two attempts with medical professionals were a complete failure. The psychiatrist prescribed me a sedative and a selective serotonin inhibitor, to cope with my anxiety. It helped, so much so that I believed I was cured forever. How naive of me! I stopped taking the meds 1.5 months later, without consulting my doctor. Why take more pills, when I was absolutely fine, right? Well, never do that! Don’t be me. Any doctor will tell you that you must take your meds for at least 3 months, usually longer, for any long-term effect. So a month without my pills, and my panic returned in full force. I had an episode in the subway and crawled back home, completely defeated and without hope of being normal again.

My husband insisted that I see another doctor. My second one was more on the side of alternative medicine, and we practised meditation and breathing during the first couple of sessions. It kind of helped, but only when I was not alone. So after two weeks I decided against continuing the therapy sessions.

By that time, my attitude towards medical help was sceptical. I began my Internet search in the hope to find stories of other people coping with panic attacks. This brought me to CBT - cognitive behavioral therapy. It sounded effective, and I decided it could be my last chance. I spent weeks choosing the right therapist I’d be comfortable with. And my search was not in vain!

With my third therapist, we started by exploring what a panic attack actually is and what it does to my body. It really helped. With meditation I didn't quite know what I was doing. But understanding the fight-or-flight body response, the adrenaline rush, and how my fear of it only makes it worse – it all made sense. Then we started to learn the encouragement technique. Basically, the idea of CBT is to not battle a panic attack, but to let it happen and embrace it. So I was willingly controlling my thoughts. When my heart was beginning to race, my body temperature increasing, my task was not to fuss over it or try to stop it, but to lean into it. I had to tell my heart to race even faster. I had to imagine flames of fire dancing on my arms. I had to encourage my body to continue with its ridiculous panic in order to make my brain register that I was not afraid. There was nothing to be afraid of, and my body didn’t need to act as it did. Eventually, my goal was to anticipate my panic attacks with excitement. I know it sounds silly, but once you want to have a panic attack, you’ll never have one!

I haven’t had a single episode of panic in months now, and while I don’t consider myself cured, I’m confident I can handle it. All that matters is changing your reaction.

I hope it was helpful.

I’m supposed to be the good one, but to hell with it! I hate my sister. I wish I could never see her again. My parents will always side with her, NO MATTER how hard I try to prove them that they’re delusional about her. She has just screamed at me for losing her car keys, while she’s been having them all along. And dad blamed me for being reckless. The keys were found, and I’m not getting an apology!

I’m 5 years older, and it’s always been do this and do that for me, while my little pampered sissy sat on her ass and ratted me out all the time. She always makes everything to be my fault, and parents NEVER question it, never even doubted their little princess. I’m always the troublemaker, and she’s a fucking saint. She was allowed to enjoy her childhood while I had two part-time jobs in high school, and yet I was the irresponsible one! My parents bought her a new car on her 17th birthday, while I’m still paying off my car loan with the help of my boyfriend. Dad pays all my sister’s bills up to this day, even though she is of age. I wouldn’t even dream to ask for money, I think it’s shameful. And they’re paying for her college – the one she chose, to become a bloody doctor. I was never given a chance to choose what I wanted. I can’t stand living in one house with her and seeing her fat face every day. I’m counting the days till February 2nd when I’ll be moving out to an apartment with my bf. Even though she knows I’ll be leaving soon, she still tries to make my life miserable. She takes my things all the time, without permission, and “forgets” to return them. She copycats all my ideas. I wanted to buy parents a new robot vacuum cleaner since their old one is dead. I suggested we buy it together and split the cost. She said she had other things in mind. The day before Christmas, she told me she hadn’t bought anything and begged me to give the vc from us both. In the end, she made it look like it was her idea and her gift! I’m done being honest with her! She uses everything I say against me and lies to people about me. She told my boyfriend I was childfree when he was at our house last month. He also said she was flirting with him behind my back. She always tried to do this with my friends at school too sucking up to them, then telling stories about me… She doesn’t even realize that other people see right through her lies. Not everyone is as blind as my parents! I suppose they’ll always let her have her way. But I’m done. I hope she never changes and keeps being her narcissistic little self, and no one will love her, except my parents. She deserves to be alone and suffering!

Hi, I think my problem is not unique but I haven’t found ways to cope with it. Any thoughts?

I’m allergic to many foods and have to be careful about what I eat. We figured that out years ago, so it’s not that bad overall. Over the last three years I didn’t have a single case of rash or any other food reaction. I was absolutely unprepared for what happened during my last two visits to the dentist. Minutes after the dentist gave me a shot (some common local anesthetics), my heartbeat hastened, I began hyperventilating. My left arm felt numb, I was so shocked but also couldn’t say much. I was afraid I’d stop breathing right there. I suppose my red face and breathing alarmed my dentist who called his assistant and they jumped around me, not knowing what to do. Then I asked to call the ambulance. I felt helpless. There were two medical professionals in front of me, and all they could do was give me a glass of water! The ambulance doctor said it was either an allergy to anesthetics or problems with blood vessels. Long story short, they gave me a pill and left. My dentist flatly refused to proceed with the procedure. But I have a problem with two of my teeth! I went to another dentist, and I had to tell him what had happenned. He immediately showed reluctance to help me. But we still tried. The minute I was about to be given a shot, I felt I was about to pass out and freaked out. We stopped, and I went home. This has never happenned to me before! I just couldn’t control myself. Now I don’t know what to do next… How am I to treat my dental problems when even thinking about it throws me into fits of anxiety?