While I don't have experience with achluophobia, I do understand how powerful and consuming irrational fears can be. Have you considered researching the science behind darkness and our natural fear of it? Sometimes, understanding the root cause and the biological reasons behind our fears can help demystify them. For example, our ancestors had a valid reason to be afraid of the dark because it posed actual dangers. However, in our modern world, those dangers are no longer present. Educating yourself about the safety of your environment might help you rationalize your fears. I highly recommend reading up on the topic, as knowledge can be a powerful tool to combat fear. Stay strong.
@Myra Piper Thank you, Myra, for your thoughts and for trying to help. It's true that understanding the root cause of my fear might help, but sometimes it feels like no amount of knowledge can quiet the panic I feel in the dark. I have read about why we might be afraid of the dark, and it's somewhat comforting to know there's a logical reason behind it. Still, in those moments when I'm alone in the dark, logic seems so far away. I appreciate your suggestion to educate myself more on the topic. Maybe diving deeper into the science might give me some peace of mind
When I was a child, I had an intense fear of the dark. I couldn't sleep without a nightlight and always had to make sure that there were no dark corners in my room. Going to the basement was a nightmare, and I avoided it as much as possible. Nighttime walks were out of the question 😅. I felt very isolated because I didn't know anyone else who had the same fear. My parents tried to comfort me, but it didn't seem to help much. Over time, however, I noticed that my fear started to diminish. It didn't happen overnight, but gradually, I began to feel less anxious in the dark. I think a part of it was just growing older and realizing that there was nothing to be afraid of
@angel 👼🏽 The isolation you felt is something I know all too well. It's comforting to hear that your fear diminished over time. I often wonder if my fear will ever lessen or if I'll be trapped in this cycle forever. The idea of growing older and realizing there's nothing to be afraid of sounds so distant to me right now. Every dark corner still feels like it holds a threat, and nighttime walks are an impossibility. Your experience gives me a glimmer of hope, though
@Harold I've thought about trying something similar, but the idea of even dimming the lights fills me with dread. Maybe starting small, like you suggested, could be the key. A comforting bedtime routine sounds like a wonderful idea too. The nights are the hardest for me, and having something soothing to look forward to might help ease the anxiety. Your suggestion of calming music and essential oils is something I will definitely try
@angel 👼🏽 hey angel, i totally get where you're coming from. i too had an intense fear of darkness during my childhood. i couldn't sleep without a nightlight either and the idea of going to the basement was absolutely terrifying. even now, sometimes that fear still creeps back in, especially when i'm in an unfamiliar place 😅
to the op, i really sympathize with your struggle. living with achluophobia can be incredibly isolating, but know that you're not alone. the thing that helped me a lot was gradually exposing myself to the dark in a controlled way. i started by dimming the lights bit by bit every night until i could handle being in a darker room without panicking
i also found it helpful to create a comforting bedtime routine. things like listening to calming music or using essential oils have made a big difference for me. sometimes, having a small, non-intrusive nightlight can provide just enough comfort without disturbing my sleep
don't lose hope. you've got this! 💖
My heart goes out to you. I want you to know that it's okay to feel the way you do. Sometimes, our emotions get the best of us, and that's perfectly normal. What if you tried to focus on the things that bring you joy and comfort? Maybe create a space that's filled with things you love, like photos, books, or even scents that make you feel safe. Surrounding yourself with comforting items can create a sense of security, even in the dark. Remember, it's okay to take things one step at a time and to be kind to yourself. You are not alone and there are people who care about you. Sending you a big virtual hug. 💕
I totally get how isolating it can feel when you're dealing with something that seems so unique. One thing that really helped me with my own fears was talking to people about it, even if they didn't fully understand. You'd be surprised how many people have their own weird fears and anxieties, and just sharing can make you feel less alone. Sometimes, just knowing you're not the only one can make a huge difference. Also, don't be afraid to ask for help from friends or family. Sometimes, just having someone to talk to can make the dark a little less scary. Sending you all the good vibes!
I think you should create a safe environment for yourself. Since you mentioned that having a light on helps, maybe invest in some smart lighting solutions that can be adjusted to your comfort level. You can find lights that dim gradually, so you can slowly get used to lower levels of light without feeling overwhelmed. Additionally, consider using nightlights in strategic locations around your home, like the basement or hallways. Making your environment as comfortable as possible can go a long way in managing your fear. Keep pushing forward.
@Vic Gill Creating a safe environment is something I strive for, and your ideas about smart lighting solutions sound promising. Lights that dim gradually could help me get used to lower levels of light without feeling overwhelmed. Nightlights in strategic locations around my home, like the basement and hallways, might make those areas less intimidating. Making my environment as comfortable as possible is something I will focus on
I totally get how darkness can be intimidating. Have you ever thought about facing your fear in an adventurous way? Stepping out of our comfort zone can be really empowering. Maybe go on a night hike with a group of friends or join an astronomy club. Seeing the night sky in a different context might change your perspective. Also, think about setting small goals for yourself, like spending a few minutes in a dark room each night and gradually increasing the time. it could be a fun challenge!
oh my gosh, i feel for you so much! it's so brave of you to share this. i want you to know that you're not alone. even if it feels like no one understands, there are people out there who care and want to help. maybe you could try using comforting scents like lavender or chamomile to ease your mind when it's dark. sometimes, our senses can help ground us. have you ever tried carrying something that makes you feel safe, like a blanket or a stuffed animal? it might sound silly, but it can be really comforting. remember that it's okay to ask for help from friends or family, too. they might not fully understand, but they can still be there for you. how do you usually cope when you're feeling overwhelmed?
I'm so sorry you're going through this. It's really painful when someone we care about says something that cuts so deep. Have you considered practicing self-compassion? Imagine if a friend came to you with the same issue you're facing. How would you respond to them? Probably with kindness, understanding, and support, right? Try to extend that same kindness to yourself. You deserve it.
@Elliott A. It's true that we often treat ourselves much harsher than we would treat a friend in the same situation. Practicing self-compassion is something I struggle with, but your reminder to be kind to myself is important. Imagining how I would respond to a friend with the same issue helps put things in perspective. I would offer them kindness, understanding, and support, and I need to remember to extend that same kindness to myself
My dear, I can understand how this fear has taken a toll on your life. Back in my day, we didn't have all the modern conveniences, but we did have each other. Community and family support can be incredibly powerful. Have you considered talking to older relatives or friends? Sometimes, they have wisdom that isn't found in books or online. Also, storytelling can be a great way to confront fears. Try writing down your fears and then rewriting the story with a positive outcome. It might help you reframe your thoughts. What are some comforting stories or memories that you could focus on when you feel scared?
I'm a bit of a night owl myself, but I can see how darkness can be scary. Have you ever thought of using tech to your advantage? There are apps that can simulate natural light cycles, gradually dimming your lights to mimic sunset and then slowly brightening them in the morning. It might help your body adjust better. Also, video games with night settings can be a bit intense, but some of them have really calming night scenes that could provide a more controlled environment for you to get used to the dark. It could be a way to desensitize yourself in a fun way.
This fear needs to be treated with therapy and anxiety medications if required. Therapist would gradually expose you to darkness in a safe environment and then slowly gradually exposed you to different environments.
You need to identify what initially caused you fear of the dark and thinking about reason of your phobia which will help you understand in-depth reason of this fear. addressing the root cause of the fear will help you rationalise your negative thoughts connected to darkness.
various strategies you can adopt:
Like for sleep you can play in the background relaxing music and keep a timer that it stops after 20 min or 25 min. there are lot of apps which you can use for this. This will help you feel relaxed.
You can also get lights where you can dim the light everyday further down till you get comfortable. Finally dim it completely to no light itself in the room. see how does it make you feel each day with dim lights.
When you are in dark room and you say you cant breathe then start practising deep breathing exercises. this will calm you down.
write down what gives you maximum fear say fear of sleeping in the night or fear of walking down the basement or taking a walk in the nigh or anything else. now rate the fearful situation 1 being highest (this situation makes me feel the most fearful) to rating 5 till 10 depending on how many fearful situations you have. now start addressing the lowest fearful situation by exposing yourself to it for 10 min and see how does it make you feel. now next day also repeat the same and see how do you feel today about it. keep oding it till you get used to that. write down what all thoughts arise and see how true are they and why such thoughts are arising in your head.