today i met new people, friends of the sibling of my best friend and let's say that it felt unbalanced.
first it was like most words were said by this new person, let's call them M, it's okay to be extra, i like talkative people because there is a lot to discuss about, like my best friend is.
but here when it was time for others, suddenly they were talked over or ignored after 3sec, and the way they talked about themselves felt like "deformed" to show a fake importance idk how to explain, also they never dared to look in your direction when they reply to you (not in a ND way but a idc enough abt you for me to look at you). and i feel no one noticed it.
so this day we had a team game in a creepy theme and M wanted to handle everything. but at one moment something happened to me, the game master made a sign by grabbing me.
and later in the game the game master said "the one that had been touched must enter the sacred place" i said "oh that's me" but immediately M was like "omg i think that's me because he poked me earlier" so we were all like "oh so he chose several people?", (no they actually just exaggerated an accidental move of the game master made by passing next to them) and they immediately took my place ignoring my signals. i didn't even try to fight because for all the game they played the leader, how can i even have my word to say i thought it wouldn't change the game at the end.
but then the game master said "not you" to them, and i went directly to the place, i was like phew finally i can have my moment damn.
but at the end of the game, the game master said to me "aha it was funny when you were the choosen one but you let M go because you had no courage" and everyone laughed. i didn't really matched the energy because it was totally wrong, of course i played along not to ruin the mood but, even tho it's not a big deal, i didn't like being accused of something when actually it's the selfish person M is who tried to made it about themselves and erase me. they weren't called out for taking all the place i was humiliated instead. the same way people shame introverts for not talking instead of saying stfu to an extrovert to let them talk.
i just explained "well they immediately took my place so š¤·" people laughed again thinking i was trying to escape the truth when it felt like no one saw what actually happened, i felt i was gaslighted.
i don't know if it matter but i was the only black person of the group btw.
also later everyone said "oh we saw when the game master grabbed you" then??? why yall reacted as if M was legit...
by the past i've been around abusive people who took advantage of me, and this kind of subtle behavior, even tho it's not the same level, triggered something in me, it's okay in this case but i just think about the injustice it can cause. i didn't even talk about it to my best friend even though she is always supportive, just because of the group effect of earlier.
do you get the frustration feeling of the situation?
