I've been raised by a single mother, but managed to get my father's phone number from her phone when I was 20years old.
I got to know of him, but ended up shuttered, wishing that I never had met him but in the same time grateful that I came to see his true colours.
Here's the thing, it really destroys me when my family(mom's siblings) tell me off him. And it's the worst feeling to come to the terms that all they had and have said is actually true.
So, here it goes; after reaching out to him I came to know that he is a reverend and so as not to disrupt his "reverend - obligations", he kept me a secret. He literally would tell my to hide in the back seat so that his church members would not see me.
I also attended one of his ordinations where he made a declaration that he only had one family and that he does not drink, yet many a times when I entered his car and he smelt of alcohol. Once he even offered to buy me alcohol and he even took me to a club.
This has really affected my trust on people who lead in church.
I feel unwanted, unloved, a mistake; since I was born out of one of his affairs while he was still married to his wife, whilst being a church leader.
Ooh and despite not having a job, he borrows me money to add the icing on the cake.
