hi. i am 21(m) and my girlfriend is 20(f). i am in a relationship for over a year now. everything was just as i expected from the beginning. but since the last 5-6 months, things started to go down real quick. i feel like a lot of things have changed in both our lives. both of us dont have a normal lifestyle. we both are living a life that people wont prefer living. but i think the main reason of all the problems is the long distance. i am studying in a different city, as we are indians, we are not allowed to go into a living relationship. i know the society is conservative. still i wanna work things out. but nothing changes.
i dont know why she just stopped being nice to me. in face her behavior is always rude. she doesnt like spending time with me anymore. i always think that she is into someone else but i cant jump into conclusions right? she finds me annoying. no matter what i do, she doesnt feel happy about it. i give efforts, a lot infact. she doesnt. she has stopped giving fucks about me and its been a long time now. i cant even leave her as i love her so much. she is the girl of my dreams. and she cant leave me either because her family likes me now.
her behavior is, in short, toxic. she never speaks like a normal girl. she is either screaming or abusing me. but when i raise my voice, i become a victim of the feminist movement. "you cant talk to a girl like that". when she does that, its always "you go queen" drama. she doesnt give a fuck even if i dont contact her for days. she doesnt call me or text me in the first place. whenever i call her, she sounds irritated just by hearing my voice whereas i am the one dying to talk to her.
i live alone and i have no friends. i am diagnosed with schizophrenia. its hard for me to even maintain sane behavior at times and it feels like shes being a burden. she is not the girl i fell in love with. she is not the girl she was last year. she is just so different. she was my last resort to escape the daily circus of this shitty world. she was my shelter. now all she does is fuck me up, fuck my mental health up. she has become narcissist. she is always like "i dont give a fuck about what happens to you unless it affects me.". i dont know why shes doing such things but yeah, its hard, specially when it comes from the person whom you love the most and the only person you talk with.
i dont know if im ever gonna come back to this site but i had to get my head clear. bye
Hello!
I’m really sorry that this happened to you. Unfortunately, we cannot always find a common language with relatives and friends, we cannot always understand each other. It is especially difficult to do this when we have different views, values and ideas about life.
In this situation, I understand both of you – you want to do something for yourself and your parents are worried about your future. There is no right or wrong, everyone has his own position.
I agree with you that it is important to enjoy life and do what you like (of course, this should be safe for life and health). If you really like the tattoo - okay, at that moment you needed this. The only thing is to convey your position to your parents.
But in order to physically protect yourself when talking, you’d better do this not one-on-one, but in the presence of other people (for example, relatives) or in a public place (in a cafe). It’s better when you have a person with a neutral position who could act as a moderator and give both sides an opportunity to speak constructively. If there is no such person, you will have to master effective communication skills.
After all, you have already got a tattoo, and I am sure that sooner or later your parents will accept your decision. Also, this situation can be a good simulator to learn to stand on your own, to protect your interests.