I'm really sorry about your situation. It's incredibly difficult and frustrating. It seems like you've been very patient and understanding, but your needs and feelings matter just as much. If he's not willing to communicate or make an effort, you might need to consider whether this relationship is still serving you. Sometimes people do grow apart, and that's okay. It's important to focus on your happiness and mental health. Maybe take some time to reflect on what you want in a relationship and whether you're getting it here.
@Spencer I agree. It's really hard to feel neglected, especially when the person you love isn't giving you the attention and care you need. But before jumping to any conclusions, it's important to take a step back and try to see the bigger picture. I once had a boyfriend who acted similarly to how your partner is acting now. Out of nowhere, he started to change. He became distant, stopped calling me as much, and rarely made time for us anymore.
Like OP, I tried to be patient. I thought maybe he was going through something tough at work or with his family. I kept telling myself that things would get better with time. But as weeks turned into months, I started to feel more and more neglected. I would text him, telling him how hurt I was by his behavior, but he rarely responded. When he did, it was usually just to tell me he needed more time and was dealing with a lot.
Eventually, we had a serious conversation about our future. It turned out he was dealing with a lot of personal issues that he hadn't shared with me. While it didn't excuse his behavior, it helped me understand where he was coming from. We decided to take a break to figure things out, and during that time, we both worked on ourselves. In the end, we decided to go our separate ways, but I was at peace with it because I knew I had done everything I could.
So, my advice to you, OP, is to take some time for yourself. Reflect on what you want and deserve in a relationship. Try to communicate with your partner, but also make sure you're not losing yourself in the process. Your happiness matters, and sometimes, taking a step back can help you see things more clearly. Don't jump to conclusions right away, but also don't ignore your own needs and feelings.
@Spencer Yep, beautifully said. OP, another thing to consider is your own personal growth. While it's painful to feel neglected, this might be an opportunity to focus on yourself. Sometimes when we're deeply involved in a relationship, we lose sight of our own needs and desires. Take this time to rediscover your passions, spend time with friends and family, or even pick up a new hobby. It's important to remember that your life and happiness don't solely depend on your relationship. You are a whole person on your own, and your worth is not determined by someone else's actions.
@Spencer Spencer, you're spot on. One last piece of advice from my experience: take things one step at a time. It's easy to get overwhelmed when you're dealing with emotional pain and uncertainty about your relationship's future. Break things down into manageable steps. Start by focusing on your immediate needs and well-being. Give yourself permission to feel your emotions without judgment. It's okay to feel hurt, confused, or even angry. Acknowledge these feelings and allow yourself to process them. Then, take small steps towards addressing the situation. Whether it's having a conversation with your partner, seeking therapy, or spending more time on self-care, each small action can contribute to your overall well-being.
@girlmeetsworld That's some really solid advice. It's so important to communicate openly and honestly, even if it feels uncomfortable. OP, one thing to keep in mind is that relationships require effort from both sides. If one person is doing all the emotional labor, it's not a balanced relationship. However, it's also vital to recognize that everyone handles stress differently. While it's not fair for him to neglect your feelings, understanding his perspective can sometimes provide clarity. It might be beneficial for both of you to talk through your issues. It's okay to set boundaries and prioritize your own well-being. If he's not willing to meet you halfway, you deserve to be with someone who values and respects you enough to put in the effort.
@girlmeetsworld Those are great points. OP, another aspect to consider is the possibility that he might not fully realize the impact of his actions on you. Sometimes people get so caught up in their own stress and problems that they become blind to how their behavior affects those around them. However, if after all this effort, he still doesn't make any changes or show understanding, it might be time to reevaluate the relationship. Like I said, it's okay to outgrow relationships, especially if they're no longer fulfilling or supportive. You deserve to be in a relationship where you feel valued and cared for. Don't settle for less than you deserve.
From what you've described, it seems like you might have experienced something called "love bombing." Love bombing is when someone shows a lot of affection and attention at the beginning of a relationship, often making grand gestures, and then suddenly withdraws that affection. At the start, he might have been very attentive and caring, making you feel very special and loved. This can make the sudden change in his behavior even more confusing and hurtful. When someone love bombs, they often create a very intense and fast-paced connection, which can feel amazing at first. But the problem is that this kind of intensity is usually not sustainable.
Once the initial excitement fades, the person who was love bombing may pull back dramatically, leaving the other person feeling neglected and confused. It's as if they turned off a switch. This can be really hard to understand and accept, especially when you remember how things used to be.
The phrase "love bombing" comes from the idea that the person is "bombing" you with love and attention to win you over. But once they feel secure in the relationship, they might start to show their true colors. This can make you feel like you did something wrong or that you're now unimportant to them. But it's important to remember that this shift is not your fault.
@katie Oh, so that's what it was? 😂 I had no idea there was a term for it, but it makes so much sense now! I guess I've been "love bombed" before too. Let me tell you, it was quite the experience. This guy I was dating would send me flowers every day, and he even wrote me a song. 🎶 I was on cloud nine! It felt like I was living in a rom-com movie.
But then, out of nowhere, he started to pull back. One moment, he was planning these elaborate dates, and the next, he was "too busy" to even text me back. It was like he vanished into thin air! 🌬️ I remember thinking, "Did I do something wrong?"
The sudden change was so confusing. One day, he was talking about our future together, and the next, he was ghosting me. I went from feeling like the most special person in the world to wondering if I even mattered to him. It was quite the rollercoaster ride, and not the fun kind you find at amusement parks! 🎢
@katie Oh, Katie, thank you for asking! 😊 You know, at first, I was really down and confused. I kept replaying everything in my head, trying to figure out what went wrong. I even considered becoming a detective to solve the mystery of the disappearing boyfriend! 🕵️♀️ But then I realized, life is too short to dwell on someone who doesn't appreciate you. I even joined a dance class. 💃 You wouldn't believe how liberating it feels to dance your worries away! Plus, I can now laugh about the whole situation. I mean, who gets flowers every day like they're living in a Hallmark movie? 😂 It was a wild ride, but I came out stronger that’s for sure. And hey, now I have a great story to tell at parties!
@katie Aww, thanks! 😊 I’ve always believed that laughter is the best medicine. Life throws curveballs at us, but we have to swing back with a smile. I figured, why waste time crying over someone who doesn't see my worth when I could be out there living my best life? Plus, it’s fun to imagine what my “detective agency” would look like—solving mysteries of vanished love interests! 🕵️♀️🔍 I’ve learned to focus on what makes me happy and surround myself with people who genuinely care. It's like having my own little squad. ☀️ And whenever I feel down, I just remind myself that every storm eventually runs out of rain. So, why not dance in the puddles while you can? 💦 I think it's important to remember that self-worth comes from within, and the right people will always appreciate and love you for who you are.
@catalinabrekke188 It sounds like you really went through something similar to Sangita. I'm glad sharing this has helped you make sense of your experience too. It's so disorienting when someone can switch their behavior so drastically. The initial affection and attention can make the sudden withdrawal even more confusing and hurtful. I think it's really important to recognize the patterns in such behavior so that we can better understand our own emotions. Were you able to recover from that situation?
@catalinabrekke188 It’s really amazing to hear how you’ve turned such a difficult experience into something positive. Your ability to find humor and joy, even in the midst of confusion and hurt, is truly inspiring. It sounds like you’ve built a strong support network around you, which is so important. I’m happy to hear you’ve surrounded yourself with uplifting people and found activities that bring you happiness. Your outlook on life is something we could all learn from. It’s a reminder that even in the toughest times, we have the power to find light and laughter. How did you manage to keep such a positive attitude, and what advice would you give to others going through similar situations?
Hi dear, your post really touched my heart. 😢 It’s so hard when someone you love seems to turn away from you. You’ve been incredibly patient, and it’s normal to feel the way you do. Maybe try to have a face-to-face conversation with him where you can both express your feelings. Being in each other’s presence can help convey emotions that texts and calls can’t. Please take care of yourself and ensure you’re surrounded by friends and family who can support you during this tough time.
I’m sorry you’re feeling this way. It’s really hard when someone you care about seems to drift away. While giving him time is important, it’s also crucial that he understands the impact his behavior is having on you. Maybe you could suggest doing something together that you both enjoy, something that used to make you both happy. This might help rekindle some of the connection that feels lost right now. And remember, it's okay to set boundaries about what you need in a relationship. Your feelings and needs are just as important as his.
Hey there, I can really sense a lot of pain in your words, and I just want to say that it’s completely valid to feel the way you do. Relationships are partnerships, and they require effort from both sides. While he may be going through a tough time, it's important for him to communicate that with you more openly. Maybe you can try writing him a heartfelt letter where you lay out your feelings without interruption. Sometimes written words can have a powerful impact and might make him realize the gravity of the situation. Remember to prioritize yourself too.
hi 👋 it must be so tough to see someone you care about change so much. six years is a long time, and it's clear you love him deeply. it's okay to feel the way you do. i would be so upset too. sometimes people go through phases where they’re overwhelmed and don’t know how to express it. it’s not fair to you, but it happens. maybe give him a bit more space? i knw you’re worried, but maybe he goes through stuff he’s not ready to talk about?
Every relationship goes through rough patches, and sometimes people deal with stress in ways that are hard for their partners to understand. Have you considered suggesting a break? Not as a permanent solution, but as a way to give both of you space to think and reflect. It might give him the time he needs and also allow you to evaluate your own feelings without the constant emotional struggles.
I'm really sorry to hear about what you're going through. It sounds incredibly painful to feel neglected by someone you care about. It's important to acknowledge your feelings and understand that it's okay to feel hurt and confused. Your emotions are valid. First, try to have an honest conversation with him when you both have some uninterrupted time. It's also crucial to take care of yourself. Consider setting some boundaries. If you're constantly reaching out and not getting a response, it might be time to step back a little. Give him space, but also give yourself space. Think about what you want and need in a relationship. If he continues to be distant and unresponsive, you need to decide if this relationship is meeting your needs.
It is disheartening when your partner doesn't give you the time and attention you need. In such situations we may feel frustrated and angry. So it is required that you first calm down and try understanding his perspective for this behaviour. see if you can collaboratively come with a solution which works for both of you like a particular time he could make himself free. You should also sit down and understand in this busy schedule what one thing if he does can make you happy. express that to him see i understand you are busy but atleast give me 10 min if your time. a more realistic expectation would be helpful.
If he is not communicating then Instead of giving him ultimatum it is better to address this in a calmer way. then give it some space and time and occupy your time by socialising with your friends or learning a new skill or engaging in an activity like dance or yoga or art which gives you happiness. This will also give you time to process this information in a more healthier way and think through before taking any huge step.
When you say you feel neglected it also means your entire energy, time and focus is all around him and towards him and for him. It is time you start setting small goals for yourself to focus that towards you, create a balance in life that is fulfilling towards you as well.
It is crucial to reassess your relationship with him if it is troubling and affecting you day to day routine. Many relationship issues arise from misunderstandings that he doesnt care about my feelings. he doesnt give a damn. Avoid making such assumptions and setting unspoken expectation. Instead start reaching him with a positive note first saying we had a good time with each other, how you would fly for me so that i am fine, i miss that. can we do something together this week. it is best to understand his perspective before deciding the future of the relationship. It is 6 yrs long relationship and this long journey will have its up's and down's now you have to decide what is important for you and what do you want. sitting with your thought and assessing the relationship , your journey will help you take a better decision.
@Veena Choudhary thankyou so much for your insight. I have made peace with myself . I am on a journey to heal myself . I am learning to love myself more than anyone, investing my time in knowing my strength and weakness , my passion and being kind. I am making healthy choices for my mind and body . I just realised that I forgot to love myself in the process of loving someone . I am reassessing this relationship and giving it the time it needs to heal or set apart . I believe that whatever happens , happens for good.