Just been diagnosed with dysthymia (persistent depressive disorder). I wasn’t much surprised, I felt like it since I was 25. I've tried to rebuild my life multiple times, but it’s useless. It’s who I am now, broken and defective for life. I’ve accepted it. The numbness that accompanies my depressive episodes is suffocating, leaving me feeling disconnected from the world and unable to fully engage with my own emotions. I am constantly tired, both physically and emotionally, as though I am merely going through the motions of life without any real purpose or passion. I haven't talked about it with anyone, really. My therapist only talks about how not to make my chronic depression resistant to treatment. He angered me so much when he said I’d been living with PDD for so long I should barely notice it. He worded it in such a way as if it were just a minor inconvenience. Yeah, sure, I can brush my teeth and I still eat, so why not call it manageable? I don’t even know why it angers me so. Taking antidepressants for four years made me seem like a normal person, guess I should be grateful for that? But I don’t feel like it. I’m a walking corpse. Even on the rare days when I feel alive and almost happy, it always comes crashing down on me. I’ve lost interest in things that I loved (such as playing chess and languages). My brain can’t take more than fifteen minutes of pleasure. It defaults back to sadness and questioning my life. Doesn’t last at all. No one knows how I’m struggling internally. Most people won’t understand how truly awful it is to live every day like this, not being able to be happy but not miserable enough to matter. I just tolerate it every day until I go to sleep. Feels like I’m perishing in a slow, consistent, and agonizing manner. It’s so much worse than “normal depression”.

It's been about month now since I almost died. I tried to kill myself, I overdosed on my antidepressants medication. I don't really know what happened that day. The day was just like any other ordinary days I woke and went to school then I started feeling the darkness a cloud of anxiety, nervousness, negative thoughts , overwhelming sadness and loneliness. I Tried to put on a smile around my friends but I could feel that I was losing it. The whole day and even on my way home but I could feel the cracks showing and my intrusive thoughts were just screaming at me . When I reached home I just wanted it to just stop, I was really exhausted and I just wanted a breather so I took my medication. I usually take one at night before I sleep. But I could take it any more I was tired I thought that the medice would make me feel better ,so I took one then 2 then 3 but didn't work so I kept adding one more , more and more but nothing changed , until I finished a whole months supply. After a few minutes that's when it hit me , I felt my body suddenly became so heavy I was lying on the floor of my bedroom floor. I struggled to get my self onto my bed . I struggled to keep my eyes open, I struggled to hold on as much as I can. I remember how scared I felt at that moment scared of closing my eyes. I don't when I let go ,one moment am thinking and the next nothingness no dream no thoughts, absolutely nothingness . I don't know how long I was out but when I come too the next day my parents were sitting next to me calling my name. Apparently they tried calling me multiple times a few hours later I didn't pick up they tried to wake me up but I was unresponsive they rushed me the ER . They say I was lucky but the truth is I don't feel lucky. Everseens I can't seem to get my self to fall asleep I am afraid of closing my eyes I can't sleep I have gone days without sleep and everytime I manage to sleep the nightmares come It's am dying over and over again and I can't help think that I should have died that day. I never told my friends anything. I went to school a day after that I put on me smile atleast I tried to and went on with my day . I would like to say that this was my first suicidal attempt but just one of many am covered with scars I hide I study medicine so I have gotten good at treating my wonds I inflected on my self barely leaving any visible scars a hell of my own design,, Huh! Poetic isn't it? I have been trying to not fight this battle and not give up today is day 30 so yeeeeea🎉🎉👏🎂 .I guess.............am getting really exhausted am tired I don't want to do this anymore the darkness is getting harder to see through I can feel myself slipping.

Lately, I've been feeling off. Sometimes I notice changes in my behavior—I'll feel different, like I'm not myself. I experience bouts of depression, stress, fatigue, and disinterest in things that used to excite me. It's like a mix of negative emotions swirling around inside me. I've become more emotionally fragile too; even small things can set me off, making me cry easily.

At home, it's tough. My parents constantly put me down, telling me I'm worthless, the worst person ever, and comparing me to everyone else. They expect perfection in everything I do, but no matter how much they criticize and pressure me, I seem to do worse than before. It's like a never-ending cycle of abuse. I hear more than ten insults (mostly abuses)every single day, and it's become almost normal for me to endure this verbal on slaught. But lately, even the slightest hint of criticism or yelling makes me break down in tears.

My emotions are all over the place. I struggle to feel love and happiness most of the time. My days are filled with sadness, frustration, intense anger, tears, and moments where I just feel numb. It's like I'm stuck in this whirlwind of negativity, and I don't know how to break free. I've tried everything to cope with what's going on, really. I've read up on how to reprogram my mind, tried to change my thinking patterns, but nothing seems to stick. It's like life keeps throwing insults at me, non-stop. Sometimes, I get so angry that I end up pushing away even the people who care about me. I just isolate myself and avoid talking to anyone.

Getting out of this negative cycle feels impossible. Even though my long-distance boyfriend loves me and tries his best to take care of me, I'm starting to doubt my own feelings for him. It's like my emotions are all over the place, and I don't know what to do.

Every day brings its own set of crazy situations. Whenever someone hears the full story of what I go through with my parents, they just shake their heads and say my parents must be mentally ill or something. I try to keep my distance from them, but it doesn't seem to help. Sometimes, I wish I could just sleep forever or go deaf so I wouldn't have to hear their voices anymore. I'm getting more and more irritated, and I can't stand the sound of their voices.

Being human, we're greatly influenced by our environment. It's like they say, if you're surrounded by animals, you might start acting like one too. For me, it's like living in a world of constant negativity and abuse. My self-esteem is at an all-time low, and I have little to no confidence in myself. I get really anxious around other people, and social situations make me extremely uncomfortable.

To make things even harder, I've been stuck at home for the past six years with no chance to travel or experience anything new. My life revolves around enduring these abuses, going to school, and then back home, day in and day out. It feels like there's no escape from this cycle of negativity.

I'm a 35-year-old dad, and I'm really struggling with my 13-year-old daughter. I love her so much, but lately, she shows little to no respect to anyone, including me and her mother. It's breaking my heart and I don't know what to do. I'm so anxious because of of it lately.

Every time I ask her to do simple tasks like cleaning her room or helping with the dishes, she either ignores me or snaps back with some rude comment. It's like she doesn't care about anyone's feelings. She used to be such a sweet and caring girl, but now it feels like I don't even know her. She's started being disrespectful to even her friends. I've gotten calls from her school about her behavior, and it's so embarrassing. I don't know where this attitude is coming from. Is this normal for a teenager?

I'm worried that if this continues, she'll grow up to be someone who doesn't respect anyone, and that's not the kind of person I want her to be. How do I get through to her?