Post
Ev
Eva
268d ago

is life supposed to be tough?

I've always been determined to succeed, starting from a young age. I excelled in school, consistently earning top grades until my undergraduate studies. Along the way, I pursued singing, participated in quizzes, and now I hit the gym daily, competing in weightlifting and powerlifting events. I also enjoy writing short stories — it's a passion of mine. While I may not be the most outgoing person, I take pride in my physical strength as a woman. Independence is a quality that defines me.


However, my mental health took a turn for the worse in 10th grade. The pressure from school and my parents became overwhelming, and I began to feel like a failure. At 16, I started struggling with severe and persistent depression, which has persisted into my 20s. I'm currently undergoing psychiatric treatment to manage my condition. I had attempted suicide twice, once by injecting sanitizer and recently overdosing on migraine meds. However, I sought help, and now I'm taking 3 meds per day. I don't want to die, although it may seem otherwise. I want a good life, but when I see I'm failing to make that life, I become suicidal. I need to stay alive until I succeed. My psychiatrist is helping me, but I still feel like I'm stuck. I also had anger issues when I didn't take meds. Now I don't have them, but as I've had them since my childhood, my mind feels empty, like something is missing. I'm pursuing a double degree in Chemistry and Education, and my life is so chaotic. I wake up at 5, go to the gym at 6 am, come back at 7:30, go to classes at 8:40 am, live in a dorm at my university, and have classes till 5:30 pm. It's too hectic. I'm currently on vacation, and my psychiatrist told me to slow down, but I'm struggling to do so. I fear for the future because I need a stable and high-income job too.


What do you think? Has anyone experienced anything similar to what I'm going through? If yes, please share your experience. If not, please offer me some advice.

Specialist answer
Our free therapy courses to cope with depression
Veena Choudhary
262d
Specialist

hi,


The first step towards healing you have already taken by expressing out your heartfelt emotions in this forum. kudos to you to do that.


It is beautiful to know how aware you are about your likes and positive traits. i just want to understand then do you still continue to write short stories or continue to do any other activity you enjoy. In this hectic schedule do you take time for your self care which is most important for your emotional well being.


It's also good to know that you know your purpose to study and work hard is to have stable and high income job. but once you have achieved that what next? have you thought what is your ultimate goal? To achieve that high income job what is happening to your present? do you think the way you are setting a schedule will you be happy to achieve this high income job and be happy, peaceful or feel you are lost yourself in this process. you need to think what is most important to you right now. without good mental health will it be easy to achieve this stable and high income job. You need to give yourself time to breathe, relax and enjoy doing what you do than feeling so pressurised.


You need to take time out for your self care by atleast doing things which can calm you down, which will help you release your pent up stress. Spent some time out participating in activities like weight lifting or singing competition. these all will give you boost and energy.


Did you communicate with your parents how do you feel. it is very important you talk to your parents or any other friend about how you feel. it is good you have opened yourself in this forum.


your life is precious and you are multi-talented. kindly understand and be aware of what is most important for you. only when you do things you find fulfilling you will feel better about yourself. so set a routine which is something within your limit and you don't have to burn yourself out.


Rules and expectation set by others will always make it difficult for you as you say independence is a quality that defines you. so why not use your quality " independence" to set your own rules and expectation to achieve things within your own limits and not over straining yourself. You need to take the power in your hand to set a path for yourself based on what you need not what others want. so sit down today and think what do you truly want. see how can you achieve that slowly and steadily. we want to see the "independent you". Embrace your this quality as this is the quality you will always have till you live.


i want you to even write down your further more positive traits and use those traits to your advantage for studying.

st
stargirle
267d

My life has been full of ups and downs, and at times, I have felt completely overwhelmed by the stresses and pressures of daily life. I have also struggled with mental health issues, and I know how challenging it can be to balance everything and find a sense of stability. One of the most important things I've learned is to take things one day at a time and to give myself the space to breathe and take care of myself. It can be tempting to try to pack our schedules full of activities, but it's important to recognize that we all have limits, and it's okay to take a break when we need it.

It's also important to recognize that failure is a normal part of life and that it can be a powerful learning experience. Failure does not define us, and it's okay to make mistakes and learn from them. We are constantly evolving and growing, and it's important to give ourselves the opportunity to do so. In terms of your academic and career pursuits, it's important to remember that success is relative, and it's important to focus on the progress you are making rather than comparing yourself to others. It's also important to find a career that is fulfilling and meaningful to you, as this can make a significant impact on your happiness and well-being in the long run.

Take care of yourself!

no
not today
267d

I can relate to a lot of what you're going through. I've always been determined to succeed too, but the pressure can be overwhelming. I also struggled with depression during my school years, and it has been tough to manage. It's great that you're pursuing your passions and trying to balance everything, but it's important to give yourself a break. Your mental health is just as important as your achievements. Stay strong and keep talking to your psychiatrist. You're not alone in this. Sometimes, taking small breaks or finding a hobby that relaxes you can make a big difference. Remember, it's okay to ask for help and lean on friends or family members for support. You have accomplished so much already, and you deserve to be kind to yourself. It's also important to celebrate your small victories and acknowledge how far you've come. Keep focusing on your goals, but don't forget to take care of yourself along the way.

An
Anita
267d

I'm really sorry you're going through this. It sounds like you're juggling so many things at once and it's taking a toll on you. I can relate to feeling overwhelmed by academic and personal pressures. It's important to listen to your psychiatrist and try to slow down. Maybe cutting down on some activities temporarily could help you get some rest and perspective? I know it’s hard but give it a try, even for a day or for a week? You are incredibly strong 🌟. It's okay to take a break and focus on your mental health. I’m here if you want to talk to someone. 💖

ha
harriskelton625
267d

Life is tough, that's for sure. I know something about that but we seem to be opposites. I am the person who doesn't do anything but whine and compare myself to others. I don't do anything to improve my health and my emotional state, but here I am, acknowledging it. Someone here told me that this is the first step in every recovery process and I believe it. It's important to know that something is wrong and you should change it. I think you've taken the first step. You understand that you need to rest but you just can't do it because you are used to your usual routine and I thing that's fine. We just need some time to act on advice. Take as much time as you need and remember that it's totally normal to feel overwhelmed and not okay.

An
Anonymous Prince
267d

Your story resonates with me a lot. I’ve been there too, feeling like I’m constantly under pressure and trying to succeed in everything I do. I’ve always been the kind of person who wants to excel, just like you. In school, I was always aiming for the top grades, pushing myself in sports, and trying to be the best in everything I did.

When I was in high school, I felt the pressure from my parents and teachers to perform well. I remember staying up late to finish assignments and study for exams, feeling like I couldn’t afford to fail. It was overwhelming. Around that time, I started to struggle with anxiety. I felt like I was drowning in expectations, and no matter how hard I tried, it never felt like it was enough.

I tried to keep myself busy to distract from the negative thoughts. I joined the basketball team, started learning guitar. But the more I tried to do, the more exhausted I became. I felt like I was running on empty. When I was 21, things got really bad. I had a breakdown and ended up in the hospital after trying to hurt myself. That was a wake-up call for me, and I started seeing a therapist and taking medication.

Even with therapy and meds, some days are just really hard. I still struggle with feelings of failure and fear about the future. I’m studying Computer Science and Engineering, and the workload can be intense.

I think it’s great that you’re reaching out for help and sharing your story. It takes courage to open up about what you’re going through. You’re not alone in this. I’ve found that talking to others who understand can be really comforting.

To
To The Moon
267d

@Anonymous Prince It sounds like you and OP have been through a lot, and I can understand how difficult it must have been for you to go through all of that. It's incredibly hard to deal with all of the pressure and expectations that come with being a high achiever, and it's important to remember that it's okay to feel overwhelmed or exhausted. It's also okay to struggle with anxiety or mental health issues. I'm glad to hear that you sought help and started therapy and medication. Seeking help is a sign of strength, and it's important to remember that you are not alone. There are so many people who struggle with similar issues, and there are resources and support available to help you navigate through this difficult time. It's also helpful to remember that it's okay to prioritize yourself over anything. It's okay to take breaks, to rest, and to focus on your own mental and emotional health. It's okay to have bad days, and it's okay to struggle. It's all part of the human experience.

An
Anonymous Prince
267d

@To The Moon Thank you so much for your kind words. It really means a lot to hear that someone understands and acknowledges what I've been through. You're absolutely right that the pressure and expectations can be overwhelming, and sometimes it's just too much to handle. I'm trying to remind myself that it's okay to feel this way and that it's a part of being human.

Your encouragement about seeking help is reassuring. I remember how difficult it was to take that first step and reach out for therapy. It felt like admitting defeat at the time, but now I see it as one of the bravest things I've done. Therapy has been a huge help, and my therapist has given me tools to manage my anxiety and stress. I've also learned to be more gentle with myself, which is something I never really did before.

Hearing that others go through similar struggles is oddly comforting. It helps to know that I'm not alone and that there are people who understand exactly what I'm going through. Your message reminded me of the importance of community and support, and I'm grateful for that.

I'm also trying to find joy in the little things again. Playing guitar has become a way for me to relax and disconnect from the stress, not a way of being the better version of myself. I'm not great at it, but it brings me happiness, and that's what matters. I'm also trying to be more mindful and present in the moment, which helps reduce my anxiety.

Sp
Spencer
267d

To stop being so hard on yourself, practice self-compassion. This means that you can give yourself the same kindness and understanding that you would give to a close friend. Focus on your strengths and accomplishments, and give yourself grace when you make mistakes. Remind yourself that you are doing the best you can, and that everyone makes mistakes sometimes. When you catch yourself being hard on yourself, try to replace that critical inner voice with a loving and supportive one. Talk to yourself in the same way that you would talk to a friend who is struggling.

gr
greg
266d

wow! You are a highly motivated and accomplished person, and you should be proud of your many talents and accomplishments. However, it's important to remember that our identity is more than just our success. It's essential to also recognize our humanity, including our vulnerabilities, weaknesses. They're beautiful because we're human! In a fast-paced and often high-pressure world like ours, it can be easy to focus purely on success and ignore the personal emotional growth. I am so proud of you! You really are a strong person

bu
butterfly_effect
266d

Not related but: Eva is my fav name in the whole universe!! Hahaha, just wanted to let you know and tell you not to be so hard on yourself. I have the problem of being lazy and I admire people who can be so productive. Turns out, it has a bad side too. That's fine though, I really think if you're capable of all those wonderful things, you deserve a break. Gosh, even I, who gets tired of doing nothing, deserves a break. Hahaha. Take care and rest!

More on this topic