Please, help! I’m stuck in the memories of the person I left months ago!!! It’s destroying me!

It was my decision to leave, though it was really hard emotionally. She was a psycho, my days with her were miserable. I’ve never had such a terrible relationship experience in my life! She was always detached and cold with me intimately, and at the same time she obsessed over who I communicated with. At work, she had to know about all my female colleagues in detail, while raging about any contacts outside work.. When I tried to reason about my own needs, she always appeared to be on the verge of tears and made me feel monstrous and conflicted at the same time. I realized I spent my energy and money on her, and all the while I was neglecting myself and my sanity. My friends helped me understand that I can not fix what refuses to be normal. I left and spent the first few weeks mad from my freedom!

But the memories of her creep back! We were together for four years. I had an engagement ring for her, it’s still somewhere in my boxes. I remember how sweet she was at times, and how often she said she loved me. I hated her unbearable control and treatment of me back then, but now I remember her words about how fragile she was and that she’d cared about small things to make me comfortable when I was ill. A few days ago I saw a dress on a girl exactly like she used to wear, and I caught myself almost texting her “how are you”. She called me cruel, and at times I wonder if maybe I was cruel, unintentionally? Why do I miss her? Why do I blame myself now? I’ve never wanted to be a father to my girlfriend! I hate how much it hurts more as time goes on…. Is it because her control over me was deeper than I imagined? Or because I left while maybe I should have forced that decision on her?

I worked for a government agency and was quite happy with my job. It happened that I became close to a girl and supported her in her work. I wanted to be a hero in her eyes. And I was! She looked at me literally as an idol and a meter of the profession. I explained and showed her everything. Yeah, I liked her! What's the big deal? I was the "soul of the team", and after her appearance colleagues began to actively jealous. I didn't spend much time with them anymore. The conflict was escalating and I was "growing wings" because of the girl's admiring eyes. One day I had a fight with the team I was working with. In the course of the conflict, I said that if I continued to be pressured like this, I would leave. "Where will you go? Who needs you?" said one of my colleagues. It was at lunchtime. I was savagely hurt by that phrase. I started looking at job postings at lunchtime. Emotionally, of course. My girlfriend said, looking at me admiringly: "You should go straight to being a director. Now I'm gonna have to get a director's job for her. I found a vacancy for a director and called there, sending my resume. The manager answered that just today, in a couple of hours, the final interview would begin. And if I want to be on time, I have to come today and it's actually unlikely, because the director has already been seen, but the interview with other candidates will still be. I really wanted to go. The urge to quit my job on the same day was wild with resentment. I told the girl that I was going for an interview and she was happy. I told my coworkers when I left work that I was going to a new job. They were surprised, but they also looked incredulous. Something like "you are angry, calm down and come back tomorrow". When I walked into the office for the interview, the manager said the interview was coming to an end and there was no point in me coming in anymore. What? I started pushing through. Saying everything I could think of, putting pressure on them. The girl got upset and ran to her supervisor. Apparently, her story to Naalstvo was emotional and I was invited to come in. I met the owner of the business and was so convincing that .....They chose ME! I didn't doubt it, I felt like a pro! All the office managers were shocked. As I found out later, a director had actually been chosen for the office beforehand, but the owner didn't like him very much. But the whole staff did. That's why they wouldn't let me go to the interview. And that's when I burst in and broke through. The owner of the company said that he was looking for just such a "punchy" person and he liked the way I went to the closed interview. The decision was made. And I was told to fire the entire staff and hire a new one. Can you imagine the eyes of the female employees who wouldn't let me in??? But most important to me were my girlfriend's eyes, shining and telling me "I knew you were the best." Needless to say, when I came to quit my previous job the next day, my colleagues were shocked and asked me to stay...but it didn't matter to me anymore.. So, believing in myself I did the impossible...And the businessman who took me on as director later told everyone "I found a diamond in the rough"

TL;DR a close friend borrowed money from me and won’t give it back. I asked him to return it, and now I’m the bad guy.

Hey all,

A friend of mine asked me for a large sum of money ($3,000) in 2020. I’ve known him for all my life, our fathers went to college together. He is literally a friend of my family. Back then he was in a tight spot; he’d lost a job and couldn’t find a new one, was two months overdue with his rent, and his girlfriend was pregnant. To tell the truth, I was reluctant to loan him the money, it’s like I felt something like this was going to happen. Eventually, I consulted my wife, and we decided we could afford it. She was on maternity leave taking care of our newborn, but my career had taken off and I did have that extra money in my bank. I told my friend to get his things in order and pay me back when he could. Fast-forward three years, and my friend has paid me back only $500. Meanwhile, he has found a new, well-paid job (we both work in financial services) and bought a small house. Ironically, he’d split up with his girlfriend. She was one of the reasons why my wife was so positive about landing him our money… We kept communicating over these years, and last year I finally asked him about the borrowed money. It was during a family party, perhaps not the right time I agree. Anyway, he just ignored me. A few weeks later I decided it was the right time to remind him, and I emailed him. No answer. Finally, I grew weary of this whole situation and confronted him at another family party a fortnight ago. It didn’t end well. My friend, who mind you was absolutely sober at the moment, said right to my face that I was an a**hole and that it was an insignificant sum of money, so why did I keep going about it. The thing is he’d promised to pay me back, and I reminded him about it. He left our house minutes later without saying goodbye. And I was so pissed I told my dad. I presume he told my friend’s father afterwards. Long story short, my friend phoned me and called me names for telling our family members, said he’d pay me back later, that he owned much larger sums of money to other people because of his property purchase, and that I showed my true colors, etc. I know that it’s true he owns a lot of money, my father told me. Perhaps if I’d known it, I wouldn’t have confronted him. We’re doing fine financially and I don’t need this money right away. However, I’m still angry he feels okay to back out of a promise like that and make me a bad person, when it was I who had helped him when he had nothing. Am I wrong? I mean, it’s been almost four years. What are the chances of him giving the money back to me? My father told me to cut him some slack. I’m afraid he’ll settle it between himself and my friend’s father in the end. If this happens, I know my friend will never talk to me again. It’s the first time something like this has happened to me…

Hello! I am a woman and I have 24 years old. When I had 19 years old I had my first depression episode that involved hearing voices, smells and tactile hallucinations. I was in first year at College and I was very stressed in that period of time. I received help during that time and I started to take medication. I was ok for a few years. I understood wrong that I can stop my medication so I did. I started to hear voices again and I called the mental health hospital. I started another treatment. This time the treatment didn't helped me so much. I worked, but I cryed a lot even at work. After a while I started to hear voices again and I went to the ER. After I talked with the doctors they told me I need to stay more weeks until they will find a proper treatment. This year I found that I have bipolar disorder. I did therapy for 1 year, but now I don't afford it. I am confused. I don't know what I can do for my health to prevent another episode. The treatment is helping me a lot, but I don't have a job. Could you tell me more about what kind of jobs can I have? I need to mention that I have social anxiety as well.

I can't work in the field that I finished my studies in College, they don't accept people with bipolar disorder. I am very disspointed, but I need to try to find something to gain some money.

In the last job I heard voices more at work rather than another place. How can I prevent that?

I didn't do nothing complicated in my last job, I had some products and I put them in boxes and bags. Do I need to find something with less stress?

Thank you very much! Big hugs!