Hello! I’m new here and I don’t usually speak English as my first language so I’m sorry for misunderstanding in the sentences. I’m 17yo, soon 18. I have hearing aids because I have been diagnosed with hearing loss since I left hospital (after I was born, like few days later)… When I was younger, ofc I wore ponytails and similar things… You can see something on the ears, and I explained everyone what is that for. I explained for what? To get bullied? No one ever was my real friend, they just make out that they were. Everyone was laughing at me, I couldn’t fall in love with any boy because of fear that he will laugh too. I was just a child. That was in my middle school. I’m now in high school and no one in my class knows that I’m wearing them and that I have hearing problem. Or I just hope they don’t know, I’m always wearing my hair down, never ponytails.
I have been in psychiatrist hospital last year because I had some problems with stomach, my stress was the reason. I would eat something and then go vomit after like 5 mins… It was horrible, I cried every day in school, I was in the school toilet for like 3-4 hours and just cried myself, I was self harming myself too. My one friend was helping me, if she wasn’t I would’ve probably been dead…. so you know how bad I was. I won’t lie, I still am bad. Every day is worse than the other. I’m afraid what will happen in this school year…
I’m diagnosed with BPD, depression, anxiety and self harm. Too much for (then) 16yo girl don’t you think? I have alot of problems with my mom too… We argue so much sometimes that she even doesn’t look at me.. So, that’s the beggining of my story… Sorry for such long message..
xx
