my mom's behavior. I'm 18 and have been having severe panic attacks for the last year and a half. that's what my psychologist said. I don’t think so myself, because maybe it’s something else. The fact is that I have been living in this condition for a long time and my mother does not allow me treatment. the first year, when this effect had not yet taken hold and I went once to a psychologist with her cuz was underage. session hour. For the first 30 minutes she sat with me without allowing me to really say anything, then the doctor asked her to leave and she stood at the door as if she was eavesdropping...or was it just me? let's ignore this fact, I wasn't sure. After that, my mother said that the psychologist was useless and we would no longer attend therapy. that's it..what's next? Then there are a lot of reproaches and “pull yourself together, you can control this” “program yourself and everything will be fine” “just breathe deeply and everything will pass.” I lost my mind. These phrases began to cause aggression in me. I'll tell you honestly. When a person doesn’t understand your condition and says so, it infuriates me. Before all this, I was experiencing severe stress and wanted to kill myself, which my mother told the therapist about without my knowledge. She also says “look, this child has a disability, he is fighting for life, and you cut your wrists and want to kill yourself.”. (this especially irritates me) She also seems to be ashamed of me. Or she says that she’s tired of me and it’s all my fault, etc. Things got worse over time and I didn’t go into remission at all. and now I go to therapy once a week for panic attacks. And then, it was a necessary measure. By the way, now when I feel bad, my mother gets worried and has a hypertensive crisis, apparently due to stress, for which, of course, she blames me. It’s very difficult for me because I have no one else in my family, and even when I feel bad too and I’m in a panic, I help her, bring her water, etc. And when, during her hypertension, I sit down to check my pulse or blood pressure, I always hear “Everything is fine with you, stop measuring this crap, you’re stressing me out,” it’s all gotten to the point where I get very upset and blame myself for it. Also, many doctors said that I should visit a psychiatrist, but I live in a country where all this is recorded, and even one visit to a psychiatrist could end with me not going to university, not being able to work at a good job, being the scum of society and not I can drive a car..like this. I'm completely confused and don't understand what to do☹️ in a year I will have the opportunity to move in with a girl and leave her. and while I don’t have the opportunity to do this and I’m under the care of my mother, so to speak, then I would really like to get advice on how to learn to perceive it differently or how to ignore it..

After a verbal altercation that nearly escalated to physical confrontation between me and one of my abusers, I’m facing the threat of homelessness. My abuser was “kind” enough to put a timeframe on when they intend to vacate me but my goal is to get away at my earliest convenience.

What makes navigating tricky is that the abuser in question is a relative, more specifically the woman who birthed me. From the age of 8 I’ve despised this woman and my disdain continues to grow for everything she put me through. And despite actively receiving professional help through therapy and other support resources, I have no intention of maintaining contact with her. I’m estranged from all of my relatives because they’re hateful, ignorant and overall toxic.

It’s because I grew up in the environment I did and seeing how the people surrounding me behaved I promised myself I’d be different. I said I’d break the cycle and meant it. And while I’m discontinuing generational curses, what comes with it is being the “black sheep”, but I’m okay with that. No part of me wants to rekindle anything with my relatives. I’ve already done enough soul-searching to know the second I’m able to go no contact, I’m leaping to take it.

If the worst case scenario comes to fruition, I want it known I gave it my all. Through evading abusive relatives, chronic health complications, recurring sexual assault, being stalked and domestic violence, I put my heart, being and spirit into everything I’ve done and regret nothing. I’ve always welcomed adversity that promotes growth and grinned in the face of uncertainty. My determination is unwavering because I know I’m the only person who has the power to change my circumstances. At this moment I feel lonely, isolated and overwhelmed without anyone outside my therapist and workshop I can safely confide in, but I’m also transforming this sadness into motivation because allowing grief to debilitate me won’t help.

Today, I woke up feeling refreshed after an 8hr rest. I took 15 minutes to clean my space, showered, and then cooked myself breakfast. I gradually worked through my self care routine and followed up with resources I researched and was referred. Before I left out for an interview, I made a card for a stranger. It was a blank card with floral patterns on the front. I wrote words of encouragement and sealed it in a small envelope I decorated with hearts and gemstones. I tried to give it to a woman, asking if she’d like a gift but she rudely declined, only for a homeless woman to offer acceptance. It made me happy because I felt dejected for a moment. Me and the woman briefly spoke and when she shared her situation, it instantly made me think of how anyone could easily be in her shoes. I thanked her for making my day but she walked away before I could offer to buy her food and water with whatever food stamps I’ve got left.

I’m grateful for that interaction because it really goes to show how many of us take little things for granted and don’t show as much empathy as we should for one another. I hope Ms. F. got to where she needed to go safely. Any time I face hardships, they remind me to be kinder. To myself and others, and extend grace wherever needed. I don’t know what these next few weeks will look like for me but I’m doing my best to navigate. All I ask is that anyone reading this please remember to exercise kindness, to anyone and everyone. You never know who’s day you’re making.

Hey there, so I've found myself in hot water, and I could use some advice from the hive mind. Last week I was suspended without a warning. I’m not allowed to go to my office until the situation is somehow resolved. I know what it’s about, and I need your feedback on how to proceed. It's all related to a friend I recommended for a job at my department. I thought she'd be a great fit, considering she was going through a rough patch and needed support. She aced the interview and completed the company training, but her work performance has been less than stellar. I mean, she's a good marketer, but her methods are a bit questionable, to say the least. She spends a lot of time flirting with colleagues, and her campaign suggestions are a bit too frivolous for our company's image (my personal opinion). Specifically, I didn’t like that she was being too friendly with other interns, giving them hugs in front of the clients. I tried to have a candid conversation with her outside of work about toning it down a bit, especially in front of clients. I even texted her about it. Now, I'm worried that she's using those messages as evidence of harassment. There wasn’t anything inappropriate in those messages - for a friend. Of course, I didn’t expect that it might become a public matter. I would have chosen other words if I were sending it to a colleague.

I'm torn about what to do next. Should I try to explain myself and clear the air, or should I just wait and see how things unfold? I’ve never been in a similar situation before, I'm nervous. No, frankly speaking, I'm terrified. If I lose my job over it, I'll be the biggest fool. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks!

Hi, I think my problem is not unique but I haven’t found ways to cope with it. Any thoughts?

I’m allergic to many foods and have to be careful about what I eat. We figured that out years ago, so it’s not that bad overall. Over the last three years I didn’t have a single case of rash or any other food reaction. I was absolutely unprepared for what happened during my last two visits to the dentist. Minutes after the dentist gave me a shot (some common local anesthetics), my heartbeat hastened, I began hyperventilating. My left arm felt numb, I was so shocked but also couldn’t say much. I was afraid I’d stop breathing right there. I suppose my red face and breathing alarmed my dentist who called his assistant and they jumped around me, not knowing what to do. Then I asked to call the ambulance. I felt helpless. There were two medical professionals in front of me, and all they could do was give me a glass of water! The ambulance doctor said it was either an allergy to anesthetics or problems with blood vessels. Long story short, they gave me a pill and left. My dentist flatly refused to proceed with the procedure. But I have a problem with two of my teeth! I went to another dentist, and I had to tell him what had happenned. He immediately showed reluctance to help me. But we still tried. The minute I was about to be given a shot, I felt I was about to pass out and freaked out. We stopped, and I went home. This has never happenned to me before! I just couldn’t control myself. Now I don’t know what to do next… How am I to treat my dental problems when even thinking about it throws me into fits of anxiety?