This is my life now. I’m a prisoner in my own home. I used to be independent, outgoing, and full of life, but the pandemic erased my life. My world has become smaller and smaller, and I find myself going out maybe once a week, if at all. Even then, it's only for the most essential tasks, and I'm consumed by anxiety and fear throughout the entire experience. The thought of leaving the safety and comfort of my home triggers waves of panic. I had to continue working from home because the thought of returning to commuting was just too much. And even then, I had to take a salary cut because my productivity has taken a hit. I feel like I'm letting everyone down, including myself.

It kills me that I rely on my partner for everything now. He has to run all the errands, go grocery shopping, and take care of our dog. I feel like a toddler, completely helpless and irresponsible, and it's eating me up inside. I want to be able to do these things on my own, but most of the time I can't seem to overcome this paralysis.

Today, for instance, I have anxiety medication waiting for me at the pharmacy, which is just a 10-minute walk away. It sounds like a simple task, but for me it's a challenge. I'm trying to find the motivation to leave the house and make that short trip, but my anxious part is telling me to just call my partner and ask him to pick up my med on his way home. It's a constant battle now, between the rational part of me that knows I need to go out and breathe in fresh air, and the overwhelming inertia and fear that keep me trapped inside.

I miss the days when I could go out with friends, enjoy a meal at a restaurant, or simply take a walk in the park without feeling I’m a hermit lost in a jungle. Now, even the thought of going to a social gathering makes me giddy. I feel like I'm missing out on so much, and my medication does not help me. It only stifles my anxiety for a little while.

I am 20 years female , and I am in my 4th sem , I wear a burkha and a mask and from this sem , all have to attend classes for 75% attendance with proper uniforms that is shirts and pants , I am fat overweight girl I have to attend classes but thisy fucking anxiety don't make me to do it. I am ready to attend classes in uniforms but I am scared that what if someone make fun of me , I have no friends , no one sits beside me and without maks I will be so uncomfortable because of my anxiety , the anxious persons makes so weird awkward expressions and I am scared that what if someone saw this , that's the reason I wear a mask, I am trying my best to be regular but end up in sitting at libraries. My appearance already highlights me in my class and all the prof have an eye on me. My parents thinks I am attending my classes regularly.

I know everyone will tell it's all in my head , but it looks very hard to believe this. All students in my class are so confident, I am an only muslim girl in my class. I am already a year back students. I am really really fed up of life , myself. It's getting so hard for me.I am thinking to change my department but no one will gonna take me now , and my department's will not gonna give me tc. I was ready to attend classes today but I got late.

To whom I am telling this fucking issue , they are telling, it's ok , nothing will happen , at least you should go , I know they are not telling wrong , but if it was that easy for me I would have done it few days before , they will all not gonna know until they have experience it. Due to this I have constant anxiety in my mind , I can't sit at least for 2 minutes peacefully , whenever I try to relax or sit , I recall how should I do it before , I should have attended classes from starting , now what will gonna happen , if they saw my anxiety , I just don't want to look anxious in front of my class , don't want to get insulted , I wish I could go in the past...

I am fed up. I am fed up 😔

It's been two years since I started university. I have just not been able to find my sort of people here. I prefer people who are passionate about what they are doing, conceptual with respect to their studies, ambitious and study stuff because they genuinely have the thirst for knowledge and not merely for getting good grades. I feel like the people I am around with now are extremely superficial. Caring too much about how they look or how many snaps they upload. I always feel drained whenever I have to be with them. I have found some people who don't respect my boundaries when I have clearly spoken out about how I don't want them to do it. I only have the same 6 people at most I talk to each day and they are also equally draining. I want to find someone else but I am finding it extremely difficult. I have also developed social anxiety to some extent because of which If I do leave these people, I'll just have no one to be with and it will make me even more anxious in social situations. I feel extremely alone and isolated and often try to not interact with anyone just to keep my peace of mind. I feel like these people are slowly making me forget who I am. I have been feeling mentally and physically drained during this course of time too. I feel like I am numb to everything. I don't feel excited by things I would have with before. Neither do I care if things go extremely wrong. I feel like if my life came crumbling down right now it's likely to some extent that I won't blink an eye because I just can't bring myself to care. Now everything feels like it's tuned down. I don't know what to do and am slowly losing hope. I just got my hair cut today and I don't feel anything about it. Previously, I would have been so excited to show it to people but this time nothing's happening. The only reason I even got them cut in the first place was beacuse I thought it would help me mentally. It didn't.

I am a muslim girl from India studying in engineering college and currently in 2nd year. I have Social Anxiety from years , I am fed up of this and I am posting here since last 2 years and I am in same position from last year's , I have no improvement in my anxiety , I want to attend public speaking classes , but there is no classes here with this. I want to improve myself. I gave exams of 3rd sem , last exam was on 7th dec , after my holidays started , and my college will start from 30th dec , and I am in anxiety from starting of my holidays and my anxiety just increase because we are having our director of the college as our subject teacher , she will teach us one subject from this sem , thinking about this really making me anxious. She is very strict about timings , uniforms etc. I don't wear uniform and wear a burkha and cover my face with a mask because of two reasons that we have to cover ourselves in our religion and due to my anxiety.

I don't have any problem with the first one but now because our director will teach us , she will only allow us with uniform, she said we are only allowed to wear a stole not more than that , not a face mask too , its really making me stressed , anxious and what not. I will not comfortable without the mask because I can hide my expressions, my anxiety. I @m thinking that people will judge my looks , my appearance and I am an fat , overweight girl, I will not look good in the uniform , the uniform we have to wear is shirt and jeans or t shirt. Everyone will make fun of me , and it's not only in my head , may be some of them really make fun of me , I have saw that , the attendance we have to maintained above 75 in a single subject. I cannot bunk my classes too , last time I have avoided my presentation, I have posted that problem too , this time it's more serious, I was thinking that I should leave this but my parents have already paid so much of their money , they will get so dissappoint. I can't do this too because it will spoil my future too and I don't want to play with my future but what can I do. Is there any idea that I can reduce my social anxiety within one week.

How can I attend classes this sem without warring my burkha and a mask, how can I answer the questions if any faculty asked me in front of everyone especially without a mask. I have no confidence in myself. It takes me so much time for me to relax in the class. If any faculty said that we have to explain or etc , my body start to shiver , I get lost in my overthinking zone. I can't speak this to my parents too , they already have so much stress and I don't want to give them another. Please help me to overcome this. There is so much that I am dealing in my life but it will get too long here.