I’m also struggling with mild agoraphobia every time I need to travel abroad. The safety of my home prevents me from planning the trip for months, and then I have to do everything at the last moment.
I encourage you to calm your mind and find the inner motivation to visit the pharmacy and pick up your meds on your own. Every time you do this, you beat your phobia - allow this thought to motivate you.
Unfortunately, avoiding going out only makes it worse. No one can overcome it by staying at home. You don’t have to throw yourself into downtown life straight away. A short walk will do. I don’t know who prescribed you your meds, but you should know by now that most phobias are treated through exposure therapy. You can search for self-help techniques, though I’d recommend talking to a mental health specialist first.
I don’t have agoraphobia, yet I can relate to it so much. Once I got my own place and a cat, I never want to leave it. Feels so cozy here, why do I have to deal with the rest of the world outside?? Intellectually, I know staying home for days is a terrible idea and it only worsens my mental health, but my tiny desire to improve is outweighed by the feeling of safety and laziness. Back to your problem though (sorry). I think you should create a routine of sorts that will MAKE you go outside. You mentioned you have a dog. Take this task off your partner’s list. The dog needs to go out. You can start regaining your independence with this small daily task of walking with your dog. No big parks with lots of people, just a few steps from home, but every single day. The courage and the habit take root, even if you fail on some days. Trying is enough for recovery.
@nemesis I know that! I’ve read success stories of people who conquered their agoraphobia. They’re very inspiring, however, I’m afraid I’m not yet at the stage where I can make myself do it.
What you're describing is hypervigilance and isoltion which many of us who have PTSD have also experienced. Sometimes when my sleep is so terrible I can’t get out of bed, I have food delivery day after day. A lot of my issues come from my fear to be traumatized again, and home is a safe space (though, ironically, my PTSD came from my previous life with a stepfather). Therapy did not help me. Who knows, it may help you. Have you tried it?
@irrelevant I have only had two sessions. I think we tried something called CBT therapy (?) I did not feel much of a change, and when the therapist suggested that we meet in her office instead of talking online, I panicked and cancelled my sessions. Yes, I know you’ll say I didn’t give it enough time. My partner tells me the same.
THIS! I just feel tired of going out and dealing with people. So I stay indoors, but like you, I also understand that I need to leave the house to find happiness in something other than going to work or shopping for food :(
@clarkberry You’re right, I’d like to tell you the exact same thing as your partner. Perhaps I have a bit more to say. As far as I know, CBT does not give the same positive results in all cases, so maybe you can research ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy), it’ll teach you skills to relate to difficult thoughts and feelings with greater flexibility and to manage your fears and emotions in a non-judgmental way. In any case, you need to give therapy another try. I suppose your therapist wanted to nudge you to go outside, but they did it too soon and scared you away. Mention this during your next session and see if you can postpone offline visits until later, when you feel more at ease with the thought. Good luck!
@Veena Choudhary should the mantra be long and musical for it to have the effect? I've seen those on YouTube, and I don't like them. I like short motivational texts. For example, I can write it out and stick it to my mirror or to the fridge.
Hi,
Covid has ingrained in people's mind that interactions with others can dangerous so many after that find themselves anxious at the thought of re-entering into the society. When you want to step out automatically your brain would start getting anxious thoughts. but remember that it is just the residual reaction of brain's threat response wanting to keep you safe. These thoughts are not necessarily true.
There is an anxiety reduction treatment called fading. it is something similar to exposure therapy which psychiatrist generally do to help out a person with this fear of stepping out. This is a way of gradually exposing yourself to the phobic situation. In this you would just step outside your house door and see how does it feel. stand for 5 min and just observe how do you feel. write down all your feeling. challenge those feelings. compare it how factual they are. now do this stepping outside your house for a week and keep increasing the time span.
Now once you are comfortable then you have to just walk outside in your neighbourhood. write down how do you feel. then do this everyday till you are comfortable. Do this exposure at your pace and continue to expose yourself then to a shop near by. once you get used to a setting then proceed ahead towards the next setting. Celebrate your every achievement.
You also need to write down what are the reason which makes you anxious to step out. see if those reasons and assumptions are because you saw something happening to your near,dear ones or is it what you read in the news, media. Question yourself if your perceptions was reality based. was there a fact supporting it and to prove it. This will help you assess your inhibitions. write each one individually and assess it.
You also need to have a mantra which you need to keep repeating to yourself and even keep a reminder in your phone where that mantra gets displayed on the screen every half hour. this is just to train your brain to believe it. mantra like i need to go out and breathe fresh air. This is what you want to do so keep repeating this to yourself.
whenever you feel anxious start breathing all the way into your stomach and slowly let the air out. A longer exhale will be a signal to your mind that everything is fine and just relax.
Start visualising how would it be if you step out, how would it be to meet people around, how that freedom to do things on your own like shopping would feel like. Then question yourself what is it in me that is holding me back, stopping me from stepping out, what is the main hurdle which is stopping me from taking the first step. figure out an effective if then plan to get past the obstacle.
kindly even talk to therapist. ask her if she can continue online conversations till you are comfortable to step out.
If you like short motivational text just go ahead and do it. mantra is personalised so what you like saying and doing only would benefit you. everyone have their own priorities, preferences, perception so mantra is based on each individual's desire and choice.
It can be truly overwhelming to go from being an outgoing and independent person to feeling like you're a prisoner in your home. The pandemic has indeed led to significant changes in many people's lives, and it's common for mental health conditions, such as agoraphobia, to worsen due to the pandemic. The good news is that it's possible to manage symptoms of agoraphobia and lead a full life with the right treatment. If you're not in therapy at the moment, I'd suggest considering it. There are many options to do therapy online or have a therapist come to your home, at least initially.
One of the most common effective approaches for anxiety disorders, including agoraphobia, is cognitive-behavioral therapy. CBT can help identify unhelpful thinking patterns that lead to negative actions, and teach new, realistic thinking to help you act more positively. For example, people with agoraphobia often fear panic attacks that they believe could kill them. Through CBT, a therapist might help you challenge this belief, highlighting that while uncomfortable, panic attacks are not fatal and will pass. As your thinking shifts, it can help you gradually confront situations that previously caused fear. A therapist can help you do it in a controllable manner.
You may also try identifying the thoughts on your own by writing them down each time you have an anxious feeling, before leaving the house or when you just think about it. Write down every thought and image that comes up in a notebook or notes app on your phone. After a week or so of doing this, you may notice some patterns, like what it is exactly that you're afraid will happen. You can challenge the thoughts by asking yourself questions like "What's the likelihood of this happening?", "How did it go before?", "What facts support and contradict this belief?". It can also help to consider the worst case scenario and how you can manage it. For example, if you're afraid of a panic attack, learn about strategies that can help and have them in mind, like naming and counting things around you or slow breathing, such as counting to 3 each time you breath in and out. Then create an alternative thought that would support you and help you feel less anxious, for instance: "Even if I get a panic attack, I can ease it with grounding techniques and it will pass like before".
Taking care of yourself also plays a part in managing agarophobia. Consider building more healthy habits such as avoiding alcohol, caffeine and other substances, having nutritious meals, sleeping for at least 7-8 hours, doing regular exercise, etc.
Remember to be patient with yourself - feeling better takes time, but it's definitely possible with the proper support and self-care.