So here is my another problem, you all know I post about my social Anxiety here , may be this problem is related SA only, so I had a friend in my class who is not my friend anymore bcoz I told him to keep distance from me bcoz he was awkwarding then that awkwardness turned into overthinking and then anxiety, he is an extrovert person and I am not, he has done nothing wrong according to a normal person , but for me as socially anxious , he has awkwarded me, he has help me a lot , a lot in everything, I am so regretting that why I had done this to him.
I was like his first priority in his friend's list , but I get awkward every time when he leave his friends and walk with me whenever and wherever he saw me ,his friend's was like , what , where are u going ? He tell that wait for me , I will drop her(me) till my auto. This was awkward for me
He keeps standing there till my auto get cross the road from there, this was awkward for me.
No doubt he had something to tell me, which he didn't told me yet, may be had feelings for me.
From that thing I started to ignore him , in thinking that if I ignore him , he will be distant himself for me , which he had done , but why I am not able to accept that , I feel like I betrayed my friend who was so loyal for me.
And one more thing that added to my stress is I have crush on someone which I previously shared that accidentally or coincidentally we are having eye contacts , may be I am awkward , so my crush is his friend, we were having eye contacts, now I am just controlling myself whenever I am near him , so I don't know if my crush told him this about eye contacts. I don't know , trust me I am so embarrassed at this , I think like my crush is stalking me on snap , I am not sure but 75% I think , it's him , what if they both are stalking me , previously that guy in snap , asked me where do I live , etc , I replied angrily that what u wannna do with it then he never ask anything from me , but didn't remove me either from his friend's list.
What my friend is gonna think of me that I had distant him and I am interested in his friend, although i don't want to be in any relationship , he is treating me like a biggest lesson for himself , I saw his status but he will not be notified that I saw.
I don't know whether he has blocked me on WhatsApp , I don't know why I am not happy with this , he was taunting me in our labs , and if I talked to him , my crush will be disappointed and what he will do to me then , I can't even sit in class now , I am that embarrassed, plzz God give me strength to handle this , I don't know what to do now , he is not even seeing me now , of course I disappointed him and bcoz of this we were not talking and my crush got a chance to tell my friend , what if it's true or what I don't know .
Today there was my exam and it was so good and I was so happy but then I felt they both are together and then my full mood got spoiled within minutes when I felt they are together.
Edit: Why the comments got so less in this feelyou platform ?
Edit: They are together making strategies and stalking me on snap , today it was my exam , while the I'd of snap which I doubted uploaded a story at our exam hours and also , also my friend's profile is visible to me from today , I am now 100% dammnn sure , they are them , what shall I do now , I am so embarrassed.
Isn't a normal thing to have a crush on someone ?
Am I a characterless person ?
