Everything inside me screams from helplessness and injustice of it all! I don’t hate my sister-in-law, as a woman, I want to support her, I really do. And I know she's been through a lot. It's been three long years since she moved in with us, seeking refuge from her abusive ex-husband. Three years of watching her struggle being a young mother, and three years of feeling the walls of my own life closing in on me. As much as I want to help her, I can't take it anymore. It's not just about her not contributing to the household or being oblivious to the impact of her presence; it's about feeling like I'm suffocating under the weight of her problems.

Our relationship has taken a turn for the worst the last three months. Ever since she smacked me on the mouth for trying to help her with her baby. She apologized, and we both act as if we’re fine. But I’m not. I can’t stand it anymore hearing her say she regrets having her baby, all the while I’m trying so hard to get pregnant. I can’t stand her being so controlling and anxious about everything, having to go on tiptoes in my own house because loud noises make my sister-in-law jump and lash out. I would call her passive-aggressive if she didn’t have so many issues. I know she's been through hell and back, and I can't imagine the pain she must have endured with her ex. Because of this, I don’t dare to share my feelings with my husband. I can’t use the word “abuse”, it was my sister-in-law who was abused by her husband. If I only hint that her behavior is domestic abuse in my eyes, I’ll be called a heartless bitch and I probably will be a bitch in our friends’ opinion. But I feel that she is being mentally and verbally abusive towards me every single day, and I can’t excuse it for her depression or her temper tantrums anymore. When she hit me, my patience with her ran out. I can't stand domestic violence from anyone, especially not from my own sister-in-law. If she ever raises a hand on me again, I will tell my husband, that’s decided. I regret not telling him three months ago, but I feel that the moment is lost now. And would he even believe me? He'd think I’m exaggerating or making a big deal out of nothing.

I want to tell him how I feel, but I'm afraid. He's always been so selfless in his desire to help others. I married a freaking Robin Hood! Nobody told me his sister would come as a bonus. God, I feel guilty even for writing this… How can I possibly accuse my sister-in-law of being violent, aggressive, selfish, when she’s the victim? But at the same time, I can't keep living like this. I feel like I'm drowning.

I want her out of my house and my life. It feels immoral to think about asking her to leave when she has nowhere to go and with a child. But at the same time, I can't ignore the fact that her presence makes me neurotic. I don't know what to do. I feel torn between my duty and my own need for space and peace. I just wish there was a solution that doesn't make everything my fault.

I had an issue with my mum. Her brother in law came to Sri Lanka, he is loved by all of me my siblings. I wanted to be with him for a few days and introduce my husband too. He came cause his mother passed away. Yesterday I told mum that I will be coming to the funeral and then will stay for a few nights as my uncle is there. When we got home my mum was acting bit strange as if she didnt like my husband I stay for a few days. When I ased about sleeping arrangements she gave us a room with lots of storage and dust and all. She knew this but my husband didnt. When he checked the room he said we cant stay as we both have sinuses. And for the first time in my husband's life (He is a very patience guy who never complaints) he has understood that my mum didnt like us to stay there. Honestly we wont mind staying on floor even. But she gave the worst room. And after the funeral I told my family that we wont stay and we will go back. My mum was not hesitant, she didnt even ask why or didnt ask to stay. I am so upset cause my husband's family never even hurt me by a word, but this is how my mom treat my husband. And today morning, I blamed my mum, but she was saying that eventhough she was tired she gave us a banana, and we are the ones who hurt her. FOr the whole lifetime she has been treating me differently and I have mum issues. I always look for her love and appreciation which I get rarely. This is the first time I stepped up and blamed her. She is a very self centered person, who thinks that we must treat her a queen cause our father passe away. Am I wrong?

Hi

I delivered my baby on August second about 3 weeks back. It was an emergency cesarean. As my mother passed away, from the time I was pregnant, my mother in law was saying she will take care of me post delivery. When I reached native ( I was doing post graduation else where and came for delivery), I was craving to stay at my home and spend time with my younger brother and father. But upon asking to stay at my home for 2 days, my in laws didn't agree. I cried so much but suffered everything and didn't tell them. My tension was increasing day by day on staying at in laws home ( husband is working elsewhere) and finally it led to emergency c section. Post delivery I came to their house, as my baby wakes up at night iam not able to sleep in night but morning my mother in law comes , when I just close my eyes after putting the baby somehow to sleep and she asks me to wake up and drink milk so as to produce milk for the baby. They always blame for not eating , says I don't feed properly rtc. They are over caring for the baby and consider me as a milk producing machine for the baby. I fee like running away from this cage.

My wife left me! Out of the blue! She left me for her parents. We didn't quarrel at all! We have a small child. We wanted him for so many years. And when he was finally born, she left. It all started with her parents, who started helping us during her pregnancy. She started to drift away from me. When the baby was born, we moved in with her parents--they have a big house. Her parents were willing and helped a lot with the baby. And when I came home from work, I felt like an empty place. My mother-in-law immediately began to emphasize in conversations that I was not a father, I did not take care of the child. But I wanted to do it. Seeing all this, I made a strong-willed decision, as the head of the family, that we were moving to my home. we also have not a small apartment. For a while after the move, our relationship got better. But my wife's parents took offense. I somehow smoothed out the conflict, and now we just come to visit my parents on weekends. I think I did a good job and everything was fine. But! I missed the period when everything went wrong. There were a lot of problems at my work, I went into them, and ..... again saw that my wife is at her parents. Then we started talking, that feelings passed, but "it seems and did not pass"...and all, my wife now lives with her parents, and I'm alone. What happened, I don't know.